#life · children · parents

Growing pains

Well, when everyone has different thoughts at three in the morning these are mine. Have you ever had to watch someone you love go from the person you knew they were your whole life to someone you totally don’t know? Well that is what keeps me up at night.

This I want to believe is one of the growing pains that is in-explainable. No one really gets you when you tell them about how that happened simply because they never met this person you knew; they have no idea who the person was and they pretty much don’t care about who the person is at the moment. They just assume maybe she has always been mean or maybe he’s always so gloomy.

The saddest part is that sometimes we can’t tell someone you have changed so much in a negative way without the person feeling attacked. Yes they know they have changed and maybe they want to really go back to the person they were but they can’t. I read on a tweet that
everyone has experienced something that has changed them in a way that they could never go back to the person they once were
which I totally agree with. So I don’t really blame them for changing; I don’t want to be selfish and look at it from one side. It’s hard to simply accept the fact that they have changed but I Want us to also blame the fact that we were not there for them. And then I again ask myself how can you be there for someone your parent’s age? I personally don’t know but maybe someone does. Yes they have friends but they have become so engrossed in their own lives and have their own priorities and problems that they mostly have time for just an occasional “hi, how have you been?” and don’t persuade further to know about each other, that is for our mothers. As for our fathers On the other hand I wouldn’t know much about them but from what I’ve seen in the society is that: they mostly prefer to drown their problems in alcohol.

When I sometimes see my mum going through a phase and I can’t really help her it eats me inside out. I really want to hug her and tell her “it’s going to be okay; you’re the strongest person I’ve ever met” but it simply just doesn’t come out of my mouth and I always stay in my room so she doesn’t have to see how much I’m hurting and sometimes she will just assume I just don’t feel like going out for reasons best know to her.

I really wish that I could bear the weight of knowing someone I love has changed because of something that happened to them but I can’t because sometimes the change portrays itself in the most negative ways you could think of such as selfishness,uncaring etc. they really don’t care if someone else is sinking it’s just not their problem anymore because they went through something tougher and no one was their for them but this should not be case.

They are aware of every detail of change because maybe they’re really trying to get back to who they were but they can’t even retrace their footsteps. I think we should let people know they have changed whether it’s in a positive way or even If it’s in a negative way though we should use the right tactics. It sets a chain of thoughts in their minds even if we think it doesn’t. They’ll sit down and do a self evaluation and see what changed and maybe talk to someone who they are comfortable with and they come clean with them and tell them what they really feel. The society is so full of judges don’t add to that list I think the list that requires more attention is the listeners list. It’s a good thing to take your eyes off the mirror once in a while and look at someone else. They might really need you.

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