life · Poetry

she

I feel beautiful today
I should take a selfie
as soon as I get board the next vehicle
it’s not everyday that I get to feel this
no matter how many people
say it to me
she thought to herself

little did she know that
those words in her head
would not come to life
they’d just keep looping
endlessly
she should have seized
the moment
she should have done
what she wanted and cared-less
about what the world thought of it

she has lived her in fear
fear of being too cliché
too deep
fear, fear of being too scarred,
that she’d rather let it eat her
inside out

fear, fear of being too outstanding
that she’d rather fit in

fear, fear of being too outspoken
that she’d rather keep her opinions to herself

too scared, too scared
that she would let her happiness
slip through her fingers
because she didn’t want to
be labelled selfish

you recognize her I do too
she lives in too many bodies
she’s me
she’s you
and you

if so many people paid attention
they would recognize her
but how can they?
she has gotten too good
too good, at making them see
what she wants them to see
that she has lied straight in their faces
and they haven’t recognize it
i just guess attention has become too expensive
for the world to afford

so she’ll continue perfecting her make up,
so y’all won’t see the black bags under her eyes
due to countless nights of crying herself to sleep

 

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